Manwich: A Sims 4 Story – Chapter 2, Faux Dog Millionaire

14 02 2015

Another day, another reason to sell the family grill. Once again someone has grilled up a mess of tofu dogs, leaving that as the only ready cooked food in the fridge. This does not put off our shit-dog munching trio one bit. Errrrryone eats them. Alistair devoured one for breakfast one morning:


He appears to be really enjoying that too, musing on it’s smoky plasticness. *shudder*

Soon, Simone is up and rummaging for a snack. Alistiar decides to finally roll a whim to flirt with her in the first time in ages. Huzzah! We might get some action up in here! He makes his move while she is eating a morning shit-dog.


Letting a girl know how much she stinks while you are trying to get in her pants? Maybe not a good plan…just sayin’. Still he perseveres, even following her to the bathroom for some more suggestive chat.


“Girl, I am seriously into you…but man…is that 40 pounds of raw sewage I smell or you?” Even with that kind of pick up line, he still makes romantic tick marks with her. She is just too cheerful to be ashamed I guess.

One quick shower later and Simone is ready to face the day and whatever else is in store. But first a fast set of sit-ups…executed perfectly in a short skirt and wedges…on the bathroom floor…like you do.


By this time, everyone in the house is now awake and watching TV, some of them eating yes, fucking tofu dogs, while Alistair attempts to get his swerve on.


Eventually, after more chatting, flirting and swim time, Alistair & Simone share their first kiss…awwwwwww.


Made slightly creepy by a bemused and somewhat sinister looking Tristan looking on.


True to form, Tristan follows it up with a joke, making what could have been a truly awkward scene one that they might all look back on fondly. Or something. Maybe not…


Despite their high friendship and romantic association levels this happens. I am not sure if it has something to do with Tristan’s joke landing at an inopportune time or that Simone is just unsure of her feelings, regardless, things got weird.

This is never a deterrent to true sim-love though and right after this Alistair flirts with her anew and she gleefully laps it up like fresh grilled tofu pups. Speaking of…someone thinks it’s time for another shit-dog, while someone else does a strange mid conversation swimsuit change.


Our Simone knows exactly which conversation topic buttons to push to get Alistair thinking of her dreamily…as he snarfs soy-weenies of course. Always with the god damn tofu dogs. I cannot escape their foulness! Upon checking in the fridge, I notice there is only one left…I hope someone makes something else soon. I realize I can force one of them to cook something else, but I am trying really hard not to give in to my typical control freak ways.

Things crawl by at a snails pace and before long I am starting to think I really do need to make some kind of a douche canoe sim neighbor to shake things up but then…


“Ugh! Where is the maid? What the hell am I supposed to do with this mess?” Well, princess, you repair or replace it and mop that shit up. Except they won’t do this of their own accord without a mod, so I either have to break my rules about forcing them to do things or put in a mod that has them make repairs autonomously. This time I opt to force Alistair to get his hands dirty and wet. Kinky!


Hey, he’s already in his swimming suit so it’s not like he’s going to ruin his clothing or anything. Every time a sim repairs something in the Sims 4, a pile of garbage is left on the floor. Several things can happen with this such as they can rummage for spare parts, throw it all away or play in it. I have yet to have a sim play in garbage since I bought this game, but there always has to be a first. Some asshole has to come along and just make a bigger mess.


And sometimes, it’s an asshole you happen to co-habitate with. *sigh*

MessyKitchenAfter Tristan is done smearing garbage juice all over the walls, Alistair decides to wander off to watch the news and Simone grabs the last of the tofu dogs, the trash pile and water puddle stand alone, a lonely reminder of just how completely useless the housemates are.




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